One for All, and All in One

Note for the faint-hearted: The tone is for artistic purposes only.

Let’s take a look at some Lorwyn/Shadowmoor pairs who’s metafore I don’t get very well.

The Shadowmoor set brings 5 cards each definitely having the metafore of a crowd. The name’s the first thing to give them away: Kithkin Rabble, Faerie Swarm, Crowd of Cinders, Horde of Boggarts and Drove of Elves. The tricky part, though, is that they’re not actually crowds when they get in the game. They’re just a single creature packed with some ability that deceives you into thinking _“Wow, that’ll win my games!”_. And they do win your game if you’re playing agains the right deck. And when do you best feel it’s just one pathetic creature? When you bring your elder into play.

White

Kithkin Rabble is in play and you’re playing Wizened Cenn. Because there’s a new white permanent in game, Kithkin Rabble would become a 2/2. When Wizened Cenn’s rules take effect, each other Kithkin in play should take +1/+1, so Kithkin Rabble becomes 3/3. But wait, I should be having a rabble of kithkins there (judging by the rules two 1/1 kithkins in this case), shouldn’t they each get +1/+1? Shouldn’t Kithkin Rabble be 4/4 instead? Or have the Kithkin gone back to farming, now?

A 3/3 kithkin with Vigilance and a lot of potential would work well for both defense and attacking, but what if your opponent plays an Incinerate on it or what not? You may play Spectral Procession in response if that happens, which will make you happy, but that’s not my point.

Blue

Faerie Swarm is in play and you’re playing Scion of Oona. Since we have a new blue permanent in game, Faerie Swarm would become a 2/2. When Scion of Oona’s abilities take effect, Faerie Swarm becomes 3/3. Hold on a second! What kind of faerie trickery is this? That swarm, if we’re to call it that, should have 2 faeries by now, each getting it’s +1/+1. That Faerie Swarm should have been 4/4, which proves you can never trust Faeries.

Sure, a 3/3 with flying looks good on the table, unless you meet a withering spider in your way… You wish your hand had an Unsummon now, don’t you?

Black and Red

We’re not even getting started on these. Aside of the fact that Crowd of Cinders and Horde of Boggarts aren’t really crowds, their lords aren’t really their color (respectivelly)! Incandescent Soulstoke is all red and glowy, like most flamekin in Lorwyn, while the cinders are black. Mad Auntie is all black and stinky like a true Lorwyn goblin, but boggarts have turned red (an worse, some even green).

Green

There we go again: Drove of Elves in play and you’re playing Imperious Perfect. Suddenly the Drove of Elves is a 2/2 just because there’s a new green permanent. Imperious Perfect’s ability takes effect and before you blink the Drove of Elves is a 3/3. Wait, what? So there’s an elf stading near me, which gets +1/+1, but I can see many more there in the back, behind the trees! Don’t they too grow stronger at the sight of the perfect? She’s beautiful for all of you!

In spite of the agony in a planeswalker’s heart, this combo I find the best of the five. Every turn the Imperious Perfect will summon another green Elf Warrior, which will be for real, not like the ones in the crowd, which will pump up the crowd’s power and toughness. Also, the Drove of Elves is almost untouchable by your opponents, since they can’t target it. Well, that unless they hit you with the incredibly cheap Pyroclasm.

Call for a real Crowd

All of those five creatures work well in many decks, but I’d still like to see a real Crowd creature card ability, like “This creature is X separate targets, where X is the creature’s toughness”. So if you play a spell that lets you pick a target, you can only pick one in the crowd. If it attacks, however, they attack as one. Reminds me of banding, but you only need to play one card.

Of course each creature would be 1/1 by default, something like “P/T are equal to the number of lands you control”. But what if you Incinerate one of them? What, it just regenerates right back? Not very fair… unless maybe it’s black.

Maybe we should use counters instead… “This creature comes into play with X individual counters on it, where X is the number of lands you control as you play this spell. Whenever a land comes into play under your control, put an individual counter on this creature.” Fate Transfer would be a bugger right now, but that’s just life. But what if they play “Unsummon”?

Well, obviously counters can’t be spells, so we need to have “When an individual counter is removed from play, remove it from the game instead.”

Now to refine the initial rule a bit: “If a spell would affect this creature, it will act as if it were X separate creatures, where X is the number of individual counters on it.” How nice! So if I play Incinerate now, it will only remove one of the counters on the crowd. Pyroclasm still freaks me out, but then again—life.

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I guess this is the mechanic I was looking for. It still needs some polishing, but it’s ok for the night.